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Wouldn’t it be great to simply leave behind in 2010 a few troublesome situations, challenges, and maybe even some people?

Of course, what and who I’d leave behind may not be what or who others would leave behind, so it’s possible I might end up on someone’s “Sayonara,” “Arrivederci,” “See You Later Alligator” list. But that’s the risk of it all and in the end it’s just “good clean fun.”

The one and only other time I made a list like this, to my recollection, was “Things I Wish I Could Leave Behind In 2006.” Back then, I longed to be liberated from, among other things, the Iraq War, World Poker Tour, E.D. commercials, and poor cell phone etiquette. Pretty esoteric list.

So here’s my list in no particular order of things I’d like to leave behind in 2010:

Home Foreclosures. Even if you’ve been spared others have not. Whatever their source wouldn’t it be great to leave home foreclosures behind forever? No more nightly news coverage of some poor family moving into the street.

Faulty Communications Systems—on jets and in drive-throughs. We can send people to the moon, but we can’t develop speaker systems that actually work. Either they squeak, don’t work, are way too high volume, are way too low volume, or in multiple other ways mangle the person’s speech on the other end of the line.

Poachers. Illegal greedy hunters who, despite global attempts to stop them, still deplete the population of some of the world’s most interesting endangered species, like rhinoceroses, elephants, crocodiles, gorillas, and more.

Politicians Who Cheat On Their Spouses (Wives). I’m tired of these stories.

$100+ Airline Ticket Change Fees. No way it costs airlines well over one hundred dollars to change a ticket. It’s price gouging. Same for exorbitant baggage fees.

“Wonderful Christmas Time.” Paul McCartney’s secular Christmas carol that mindlessly and unmusically repeats “Simply having a wonderful Christmas time” ranks as an all time worst Christmas song.

Postal Stamps With $Designations. The U.S. Postal Service has developed a wonderful innovation called a “Forever” stamp. It features no monetary value. Whatever you paid for it, whenever you use it, the U.S. Postal Service will honor the stamp. Why don’t we do this with all stamps? Or at least do this with all stamps at the primary letter mailing cost of the moment? Right now, $.44. This means that when stamp costs go up, a sign is posted and you pay the new rate for the new “Forever” stamp. But you get to use it when you get around to using it. No more 1, 2, 3, 4, cent stamps purchased for use with old stamps.

“Reality” Television like “Jersey Shore,” “Keeping Up With the Kardashians,” and “Real Housewives of…” Mind-numbing junior high banter on sex, hooking up, clothes, sex, alcohol, sex, clubbing, sex, and more sex. Worst for me in all this is “Dad” Bruce Jenner, 1976 Olympic gold medalist decathlete, who married Kris Kardashian, became a father to this clan and now appears on the show as basically, a wimp. It’s a sad fall from Mount Olympus.

Facial Piercings and Tattoos. If people must decorate themselves would they consider doing it on some body part other than their face? I’ve yet to understand how facial markings improve a person’s appearance.

“Sexting.” Using text messages to send salacious pictures and content would be passé and past. Consequently, Bret Favre social media rumors would ride off into the sunset with him—assuming he actually retires from professional football.

Mahmoud Ahmadinejad. Need I say more?

Advanced Imaging Technology. Airport scanners that turn travelers into naked images should be sent back to the lab from whence they came. Someday we’re going to hear how the radiation was bad for us after all, or we’re going to see a celebrity’s altogether on the Internet. I still maintain there are better ways to assure security in air travel.

Enhanced Body Pat Downs. These wondrous new methods for assuring traveling security are worse than AIT scanners. Don’t tell me safety requires we make an elderly lady stand up from a wheelchair so she can either be assisted into a machine that dehumanizes her or be subjected to an even more humiliating body rub by a stranger touching private places, and all this in front of God and everybody. Enhanced body pat downs are dumb, wrong, unnecessary, inconsistent, and ultimately, minimally effective.

America’s War in Afghanistan. It’s time to get out. Political leaders cannot articulate consistently why we’re there or what we’re trying to accomplish. And Osama bin Laden has long since left that particular building, or cave, or countryside.

Teen Paranormal Romance. The Twilight Series is tame, I know, by the rest of today’s tween and teen romance standards and certainly the standards of so-called adult literature. But we’d be better off without any of it, including HBO’s “True Blood,” blood and gore “romance,” erotic horror, and similar twisted stories about forbidden love with violent creatures.


© Rex M. Rogers – All Rights Reserved, 2011

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